Tomorrow is my seventh day of isolation. It looks like I am okay, no symptoms. So I have this to hang on too, which is good.
Today it was actually a good day. I am struggling to keep track of time, I am desperate to cuddle my niece, take a packed tube to Central London, get annoyed with the tourists and walk the busy, beautiful streets of London, banter with friends over too many drinks, but other than that, I am fine. I mean, I’ve been fine today. Tomorrow is another day and I will take it hour by hour.
Woke up at 7 am, a bit cranky (I am falling asleep at midnight instead of 11 pm and it annoys me)
Had my usual coffee on my sofa while FaceTiming with my sister and my niece
Did my Spanish lessons
Found the lilac I thought dead last year in full bloom in my garden (life goes on)
I didn’t do any type of workout, but…
I cleaned the carpets
And I thought about how I’ve never cleaned the bottom of my sofa, so I turned it upside down and gave it a good dusting
I also cleaned the walls and the ceiling (it has come to that, I am afraid)
Looked for a local gardener that doesn’t want £100 to cut my grass (preparing for the nice sunny weekend)
Waited for one hour and fifteen minutes for a Crown Court to call me for an interpreting assignment, wearing my best knickers; no one called and now I am wondering if I am going to be paid
Made salmon with cream sauce and gnocchi and had my first and last meal at 5 pm
Participated in two virtual CPDs
Bantered with friends (the dormant housewives genes are awakening in all of us and we are talking about what we’re cooking and cleaning; Jesus Fucking Christ, we used to drink and talk about work and where to travel next and how horrible men are)
Read Man and Wife
I will fall asleep watching QI
I was looking at the five stages of grief and I think I am somewhere between depression and bargaining. I keep reading about collective trauma and grief because I know that understanding what is happening to me is the second step towards healing. The first one is accepting something not right is happening. I simply can’t leave this to deities, to fate or to time to handle.
Tomorrow I want to watch a movie in my clean front room and order compost, a torch and some mothballs. And read this article again and again. You should too, if you have time, and I know you do 🙂
(The photo popped up in my memories. It’s from this time six years ago, when I was the nanny of the three bestest kids in the land and we could still run to each other for a cuddle)