I skipped day 7, which was yesterday. I was very very very low, the main reason being that I didn’t sleep enough the night before. My sleep routine, my exercise routine and my diet are paramount in maintaining a good mental health in general, and now even more so. Especially sleep. Once I start losing sleep, my reality starts collapsing. Anyway, I had a good sleep last night and today I was back on track, overwhelmed by grief for the life I used to have and now I don’t, but in good spirits otherwise. A friend suggested I should have a drink but only the thought of drinking when all I feel is loss makes me feel depressed. So I won’t take his advice.
So my yesterday was: coffee in bed, book in bed, food in bed, FaceTime with my niece in bed (“Lavi is wearing her dressing gown all-day-long” she noted), more book in bed (finished Man and Boy), food in bed. I only got up to bake a yoghurt cake. I didn’t agree with the recipe so I ended up with my own version but it was delicious, nevertheless.
All day yesterday I felt an imperious need to cry big fat tears but I couldn’t.
Woke up at 7 am
Had coffee in bed
Did the PE with Joe Wicks on Youtube live, with my niece and sister on FaceTime
Continued with my own workout
Climbed my stairs up and down for ten minutes for some cardio
Did my Spanish lessons
Had my lunch/dinner at 2 pm (I am only eating a meal a day now, I am not moving enough to justify more food intake really, so I am trying to pay attention to my body and eat when I am hungry, not when I am craving)
Removed every single book from my bookcase and shelves and dusted each one thoroughly (see photo)
Got a flower delivery on my doorstep and that made me very very happy
Cleaned my bathroom
Listened to greatest hits from the 90’s
Did the washing up
Started Man and Wife by Tony Parson
I am very excited about tomorrow: I will clean the carpets, I will attend a crown court hearing via phone and I will do it in my knickers because it’s thrilling to be able to say “Good morning, Your Honour” while wearing only underpants and this will not be possible forever, and I will participate in two virtual CPDs in the evening. I have a feeling tomorrow will be the highlight of my lockdown, I’d better make the best of it.
Peaceful lockdown, darlings.